Friday, 19 November 2010

'note'

When frustration sets in, sometimes we can never tell what is the real reason behind it.

1) Sometimes people didn't realize what they were doing...but is it best to put your blame on someone else for making you upset, frustrated?

Sometimes it's only your own actions, attitude and thoughts that can really pull you down...Previous stupid actions, silly mistakes had really done very well on degrading your self-respect. Please, stay alive with thousands of smiles and self-appreciation that you will be going to struggling for.

You had once sighed.....and your heart was aching somehow realizing how people were looking at you with dissatisfaction and even sometimes, hatred! Still, it wasn't really their way of treating you and your thoughts, your ideas and whatever you did that were making you feel so useless! but it was always your illogical high expectation for all to have the same words as yours and to deeply understand all of your actions and gestures!

.....and someone who you had wrongly thought as ignorant have had an idea to pull you out of the frustration by saying,
"you please Allah, not everyone and that should be enough.."

2) Dear friend,
sometimes being in 'that' kind of crowd may blind your eyes...and that's the way your knowledge, values and virtue are tested.

We were well educated about what's wrong with 'that'. We knew the consequences. We knew it was so hard to avoid so people were doing it with victory...and we were part of a society that was always against 'it'.
But...just see how the situations were twisted! We were definitely out of strength! and we did exactly the same thing but for our case that could be said as worse than what others did because we were better aware of......you know....than them.

and we had watched how it had ruined so many things in life. how destructive!

and now we know it was a mistake...and I guess we had learned from it...so be strong my dear friend....don't ever do that again....i'm trying..so you better try as well....=)

..........................................................................................................................................................................

-08/08/08 to 01/07/10-

Tuesday, 9 November 2010

~wishlist~

things that I wish to do/have..
*this post is written out of a critical boredom*

for now, i'm thinking of...

...ice skating
...bowling
...cycling around somewhere with minimum sunlight...tmpat yg banyak pokok..wooo...bestnye!
...nak men kejar2, lari2, lompat2 kt tepi pantai dgn kawan or family ramai2...
...rock climbing (out of sudden)
...or at least....jog kt tasik permaisuri dkt ngan umah ni pon jadikla...

the point is,
i wanna have some activities outdoor!!


Sunday, 7 November 2010

undone

I have stayed long
wishing things to change
and I realized how hard it was to pull myself out of it

Breathing in and out
there were whispers of hopes
I just stayed there...hoping that I could be the one
to give
to accept
to smile
to cry
to confront
to comfort
hey, I thought I would want to sacrifice more
Or at least...just please...read me...
I've had my own ways of being affectionate...
I might had been silenced by virtue...
it's too much hidden and unspoken...
don't get me wrong....
distance didn't count.....I care!

and the silenced part is killing me
I'm bleeding...
it's too much to tell
but I wasn't given any chances
so can you hear me screaming now???

......after all, I might not be the one who is meant to change things.....
reluctantly....I'm leaving....

*for once I wish to be understood by a person....it has been half a year...but things are still undone...=( i still ...................(sigh)...........